Perfection is Overrated: The Dark Side to My Fall Term

November is a busy month. It is a time reasonable people stop shaving and write 50,000 worded novels instead. Which is to say that November is a month for psychopaths. November was both the busiest and laziest of months for me. I took finals, became and active member of Alpha Phi Omega, finished projects, and came home. After becoming as lazy as humanly possible (sleeping until 4 in the afternoon, eating and playing on the computer until 4 in the morning, sleep, repeat), I'm back to blogging. Sorry it's been awhile.

Unfortunately, I'm blogging about less than pleasant topics today. Specifically, the three things I found disappointing or difficult about this past term. Don't worry though, I will end on a positive note. I will suggest three possible solutions to my problems that I hope to implement come January.

1) Boys
I have guy friends that I care about, that I hang out with, and that I hope care about me. But I know myself. I really like skirts and dresses. I like sports and I can become a crazy intense fan, but I don't follow or understand sports religiously. I have an annoying tendency to gossip sometimes. So yes, I do tend to roll with a lot of females. Yet this term has had an excessive lack of testosterone, enough missing for even me to notice. Part of that is an issue of exposure. I live in an all-girl's dorm (I chose it because it's cleaner and closer to the hub of campus), I volunteer with kids (don't get your panties twisted, it's true that volunteering, especially with adolescents, is skewed towards females), I don't go to parties, and I don't do any real extracurriculars like student publication or student government or god forbid ultimate frisbee. Add to that a healthy dose of shyness. Why yes, you might have missed that with my loud voice in the hallways, my penchant for raising my hand in class, and my general sarcasm and open-book policy with my blog. HOWEVER, when I meet new people or when I meet what I call real teenagers, I close up and turn into a wallflower. So, forcing myself to talk to people beyond "What's your name?", "Where are you from?", and "What classes are you taking?" have been hard enough. And, I've been successful--when it comes to girls. But, boys? They're like a different species! Combining the fact I've gotten comfortable with the friends I have, I've been dating for the past 2 years, and I went to Uni, I have no clue how to talk to an 18 year old boy. Hell with flirting, I would just like a guy friend beyond passing acquaintance. If that isn't hard enough, I watched as not one, not two, but at least like 10 different people I knew get into relationships. It's like a whirlwind. Are relationships supposed to pop out of the snow, like daisies?? I know how fast the friendships form, but god forbid, dating? Why isn't there a manual to all of this??

2) Loneliness
Fiona said it perfectly on Friday, at the alumni panel "Prepare to feel extremely lonely, even when surrounded by tons of people". Even with making friends and settling into the rhythm of academia, I have felt unbearably lonely more times than I can count. Maybe I'm doing this college thing wrong, because it seems that all my other friends at other schools have found their strides. I could be wrong. But, it hits you so starkly. I think I notice how lonely I am because it's been a real long time since I have felt so lonely. Even at Uni's worst, I was part of a community. I had friends, but I had friends. Friends that I have had for years, who I never felt self-conscious turning to. Then suddenly, I am thrown into a new school and orientation, where I probably met a hundred people or more. I've never felt so damn lonely. Loneliness sucks, because it makes me self-conscious and unsure. Instead of looking in the mirror and saying "Really, really Uni?? A Bio test and a Shakespeare paper due on the same day??" and not worrying necessarily how you looked or what you said or did that day, you become super aware of yourself. You look in the mirror and go "Hair really?? You want to look like that? Are my arms getting chubbier? I sounded so snobby and elitist yesterday. And didn't even make eye contact with that guy. You can't live in the world of academia completely, you need human connection..." and it goes on forever. Loneliness seems to eat up all the joys you had about moving on to the next stage of your life, of being free and adult-like, of experiencing a world bigger than Uni could ever offer. And on the flipside, I felt lonely, and wanting to be left alone at the same time. There are people everywhere. I even live with a roommate! Don't get me wrong, she's great, but OMG there are people everywhere in this world and I have never wanted quiet so much as those ten weeks at college. And if you know me even a little, you would now that is very strange indeed.

3) Drinking
I have many things to be thankful for, so don't take this (or this whole post) as a place for me to whine about my awful middle class experience. That being said, I've had to deal with alcoholism firsthand growing up. It sucks. Things are better now, but when I went off to college, I made a promise to myself: no alcohol. It has nothing to do with a better than thou attitude. Obviously people drink their entire lives without abusing alcohol. I'm not naive. However, I never want to lose control of myself, I and never want to regret anything. Not saying if you drink you will automatically become a jerk. Some may wonder what the problem is--I made a promise and I kept it. The problem is all the gray areas and mini panic attacks I have been having all term. No one has pressured me to drink. But I see many freshmen getting dressed up to go out and party hard on the weekends, and there is something shiny about it all. They're out having a blast while I sit at home. Weekend after weekend. Maybe this alcohol thing isn't awful. So I picture myself having one drink, just one drink, and I spaz. Why? I'm breaking my promise. Mixing loneliness and my overactive guilt complex (seriously, my mom says i have more guilt than a devout Catholic) has created a momentous problem in my brain. To drink or not to drink? It's even worse than that though. I can't go partying even sober, because I hate dealing with drunk people. A lot of people think drunk people are funny, but I only see something incredibly depressing. Their words slur together, they're eyes are overbright, they sound stupid, they stumble around like they are just learning to walk for the first time, they puke, and they wake up in the morning cranky and worse for wear. I hate the idea of dealing with that (I would of course for a friend. And probably a stranger. DARN IT). I hate the idea of even bumping into it at parties. So, it's become an overwhelming problem in my brain.

And now, some solutions :]

1) A simple smile would go a long way, wouldn't it? Basic eye contact? Yep. And maybe the knowledge that at one point, all the guys at Uni were once so foreign and male. Well, maybe just foreign (ZING! Emasculated you all lol). I'd like to tell you a little story. Once, I was leaving Computer Literacy 1 at the same time Seth Bull was. He accidentally spilled papers all over the floor. I bent down to help him out. When he smiled and said thanks, I ran. Yeah, not my proudest moment. Now? I talk to good old Sethy, no problem. And I am his and his lovely girlfriend's biggest fan/third wheel :] The point of that story I guess is to remind myself, and other shy people out there, that everyone is a bumbling fool for a while. It took me a year to really friend anybody beyond "What period do you have English" shtick. When it comes down to it, why are you friends with the people in your group? I hope it's because they are funny, and nice, and smart, and they just kind of get you. The point where you can say ONE word, or one phrase, or even look at each other and burst out laughing. However, if you are just sitting there, a mess of nerves, trying desperately to strike the balance between wit and adorable, you can bet your bottom dollar you're going to come off as TRYING TOO HARD. First step in January? Smile, eye contact, and myself. Cause if anyone, guy or girl, doesn't like me as myself, they aren't worth my time.

2) Kicking loneliness to the curb takes time. I wanted to go back to Montessori throughout my entire Subbie year. Now, I want to go back to Uni. Change is hard. Soon though, the change becomes routine. Time heals. There will be a time when I will want to go back to Knox, cause eww, real world?? The point is, to get rid of loneliness, I need to keep being active. Continue to hang out and get to know the friends I'm making. Rent more movies and watch them with friends. Study more in groups. Have sleepovers. Stay active in my volunteering. Smile at the person I sit next to in my classes next term. The point is, friendships aren't born overnight. Obviously, there was a time when I didn't know my Uni friends well: I even thought for two weeks that Rachael was Heather and Heather was Rachael. Loneliness comes with new surroundings. It won't be smiles and rainbows when I go back in January, but really, I have to start somewhere. And when I feel lonely, I will remember the times I wanted to be alone and savor it. CAUSE I REALLY LIKE QUIET GUYS.

3) This is in some ways the toughest nut to crack. However, I have a theory. Almost any job you take, neighborhood/apartment you live in, or even yoga class you take, there will be at least one person that YOU CAN'T STAND. They're so annoying. Maybe they're nosy, or whiny, or extremely racist, or smell really bad, whatever. You can either wake up every morning loathing their existence in your world, or you can be a reasonable human being and know they don't truly affect you unless you let them. The same can apply to drinking. I don't have to drink. I am keeping that promise to myself, because building trust and goals and limits starts with yourself. But, I think I will go out more. I'm a single, average, seventeen year old female. I can go out, dance with my friends, dress up in those pretty skirts I was talking about earlier, and enjoy myself. I won't let drunk people psych me out. I know that if I see someone in need, I will have to put aside my childhood scars and my morbid fear of vomit and help them out. That could be just my enlarged nurture gene talking (seriously guys, it's a problem), but I like to think it's more about just growing up and dealing with problems head on. I won't go out every weekend. I will probably still choose a nice, quiet evening at home over partying CAUSE I REALLY LIKE QUIET GUYS. Like the other two problems, this problem won't just evaporate. But, when life throws curveballs, it takes a certain amount of adaptation. That, my dear Watson, is the human quality of growing up and maturing.

So, that's it. I hope I didn't bore you to tears. I hope you aren't sitting there saying "Where's the Beef" (Seriously guys, if you get NOTHING else from this blog, watch this. LOL I appreciate her doggedness. They aren't built like that anymore, I'll tell yah http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ug75diEyiA0). An overall moral could be, college isn't perfect, and there are going to be problems. It's a new stage in life, and while it's wonderful blah blah blah, it sucks a lot too. And you know what? It's okay to admit that college isn't smooth sailing. If it is, stop bragging, you lucky jerk :P

Much Love, despite that last sentiment,
Celinda <3

Weekly Roundup 8 (WHAT?)

I know, I know. It's late. Moving on.

8 Weeks?? How did that happen? I tell you, sometimes it seems like school is crawling by, then BAM. You realize you're writing your 8th weekly roundup. Crazy talk.

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I think I did well on my Spanish test!
2) I went to a Slam Poetry Fest AND the fall play twice. Culture!
3) I got into all three classes I wanted for next term! School and Society, Judaism, Christianity and Islam, and Elementary Spanish 2 :]
4) I had another prospective lunch, that was fun
5) I did better in lab this week

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) EWWW it got cold and wet all of a sudden!
2) I almost got hit by a car on Thursday
3) I am falling behind on blog posts!
4) I was feeling kind of awkward and lame at the Membership Event for APO
5) I didn't really do anything yesterday hw-wise, so I have to do it all this morning while doing laundry

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
Probably on Friday. I was walking with confidence and happiness. Part of that was the large iced mocha I had consumed earlier that day, but there isn't any need to dwell on such minute details (lol). Anyway, I was feeling pretty good about myself. That is key you understand, because I walked with purpose up half the steps to get into the Old Main building before I tripped. The woman behind me asked if I was okay, and I reassured her. I then tried to turn it into a self-deprecating joke, because if you can't laugh at yourself, then life is truly hard. However, she just looked at me stoned-face and didn't APPRECIATE my self-deprecation. Such an awkward minute of my life...

Words of Wisdom:
Avoid gossip and drama. I have to say, it can be so interesting, so tantalizing to gossip. I have been doing it a lot lately, and I am so disappointed in myself. You feel secretive and powerful, gossiping with a friend. It's an easy way out of dealing with issues you have with people. You can gossip about the WORST person in the world. They can be mean, bitchy, cruel, unfunny, etc. and YET. Yet you are stooping to their level, because you are creating thoughtlessness and unnecessary cruelty in this world. It can be addicting to gossip, but sooner or later, it will come to a person and hurt them, or you will hear something cruel and mean about you. It hurts doesn't it? To have someone whittle all the complexities of your being down to a few labels, to just your flaws. Gossip strips away someone's dignity and their complexities, and the worse part is, they don't even know. They can't even defend themselves from the secret whispers, the shadowy cruelties. Please, don't gossip. I am trying to center myself, to stop gossiping. Really, there is enough ugly in the world, don't add to it.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Warm blankets. It was so darn cold this week. Ohmygoodness. You need warm blankets for the cold (Shorts and fans for those hotter days, especially if you are going south).
2) Classmates. I swear to God I bought one of my books for class, but apparently not. Fortunately I was able to borrow a classmate's.
3) Nap. I know, I am the crazy girl who gets up early and goes to bed early now, but trust me. Sometimes, you feel incredibly sad, incredibly burnt out, incredibly tired, or incredibly angry. Taking a nap CAN be a good thing. It recharges you and lets your mind rest. Don't be afraid to take a nap, just be smart about when and how long you take one.

Most Interesting Discovery This Week:
Academic: Sherlock Holmes had a cocaine addiction? Why didn't I know this?
Social: Slam Poetry Fests are tons of fun. However, people actually clap at them, not snap. And here I was practicing my snapping....

Best Food Item in the Caf:
Okay, it didn't happen this week, but he makes fried cheese ravioli, and it is so good you don't even need a sauce on it. I eat mine plain. MMMMMMMMMM

Plans for the Weekend:
Well. It's Sunday. AWKWARD. On Friday night I went to the play, which was Mary Stuart (very cool stuff). I slept in Saturday, then took a nap, so I didn't really do hw, but I helped make the APO pinata, and then I went to dinner and the play again with my big (my mom-type person in APO). Today, I am going to PEORIA! Shopping and getting out of Galesburg galore!

And that my friends, is another edge-of-your-seat week with Celinda!
 
Much Love,
Celinda :]

Weekly Roundup 7 (A little late...)

Sorry this is coming out  a day late. I was super, super busy yesterday, from like 7:50 until 9:30, and by time I got home, I was too exhausted. ALSO, I left my computer on all yesterday afternoon unplugged, so I found it with 7% battery...SKILLS.

Now, the Weekly Roundup!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) Getting to go back to the Boys and Girls Club :]
2) Kicking ass on my Bio midterm and my Spanish oral exam
3) Hanging out with my APO family today!
4) Going to my first Knox football game (see 3)
5) Eating healthier (minus the cookie dough in my fridge I mean what?)

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) Studying over 10 hours for bio this week
2) Not getting a lot of sleep
3) Having a fundraiser yesterday with Blessings that NO ONE came to :[
4) Getting back a Spanish test with a less than stellar grade
5) Not getting to have a real meal in the Caf all of Tuesday

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
Apparently, Knox is a very hipster school. Which is generally fine, I guess. But apparently it doesn't fly that I wanted to go as a hipster for Halloween. Oh well, I can't find my hipster glasses, so last minute costume change y'all

Words of Wisdom:
Develop good study habits/time management. Soon, I will make a blog about different styles of studying, plus advice and personal stories. College is different because you have less classes, and they don't meet everyday, so how you study and get your hw done is going to change. Keep a look out for that blog! (I promise I will do it)

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Study music. I can't listen to my favorite music AND study well, so now I have 50 minutes worth of thunderstorm/rain sounds on my iPod. Also, classical or anything instrumental is nice--just avoid lyrics :]
2) Post it Notes. I leave myself little reminders, or upbeat messages such as "You have this test! Whoo!! Go Celinda! You kick Bio ASS :] WHOOOO!!"
3) Carry-out. Knox has a system for carry out dinners, where you use a plastic carry out thing, and take out food from the Caf. When you are ready to take out again, you bring the old one in to be washed and grab a new one. Helpful for my busy week where I didn't have time to sit down for a meal, AND environmentally friendly.

Most Interesting Discovery This Week (SORRY I have been leaving this out recently! I didn't even notice!):
Academic: Our closest relative is a choanoflagellate!
Social: My Little Pony is the shiz here :D

Best Food Item in the Caf:
I've been digging the different kinds of chicken. He made chipotle chicken on Thursday, and it was really, really good :] For vegetarians, the cheese-stuffed shells have also been completing my life :D

Plans for the Weekend:
Well, the weekend has already started. I had a fundraiser yesterday (LOL), football game/hot drinks date with my APO family today, I also am going to Improv Club's comedy show tonight, then trick or treating, then frat parties. Tomorrow, I have APO :] So, busy, busy

Seven. Weeks. Hell. Yes.

Much Love,
Celinda

I Got Dem Midterm Blues

Stress.

Procrastination.

The  middle or so of the term can be difficult. I started feeling it in like November at Uni. Here, I am feeling it now. We also just had parent's weekend, so I feel both stress and a bit of homesickness. The energy I was putting into my work has all but dissipated. I'm looking at this week with such lethargy, it's killing me. I have a bio midterm this Friday, plus just general homework is getting to me. I don't want to do ANYTHING. All I want to do is go home, and sleep. That's it. Blegh college sometimes.

Just like at Uni, it's okay to get the mid-term blues. School is getting intense, and overwhelming at times. It also doesn't seem to ever stop. Break seems so close, yet.so.far. This is often the time people will get sick from late nights and not drinking enough water and feeling stress. The same activities you had so much passion for a couple of weeks ago just seem like annoying obligations. With all this negative, it's hard to pull yourself up and get your "second wind" so to speak. Here, for me and for you, I present several things to get through midterm blues!

Sunshine Playlist: Oftentimes, the weather is getting cold and miserable, school is droning on, responsibilities are piling up, and all you want to do is sleep. Here is a sunshine playlist!
 1) Pocketful of Sunshine, by Natasha Bedingfield http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gte3BoXKwP0&ob=av2e
2) Three Little Birds, by Bob Marley http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LanCLS_hIo4&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
3) Smile, by Uncle Kracker http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eskXnbVYr3Y&feature=mh_lolz&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13
4) Ac-cent-tchu-ate the Positive, by Aretha Franklin (cover) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IP9h40z0sk&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
5) You are my Sunshine http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc2jsjnt-HY&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
6) Put Your Records On, by Corrine Bailey Rae http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkEeNpWMvgk&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
7) Here Comes the Sun, The Beatles http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6tV11acSRk&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
8) Wavin' Flag, by K'Naan http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amXeJrA-wDc&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
9) Walkin' On Sunshine, by Katrina and the Waves http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPUmE-tne5U&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
10) What a Wonderful World, by Louis Armstrong http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5TwT69i1lU&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
11) Hey Ya!, by Outkast http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWgvGjAhvIw&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
12) Joy and Pain, by Maze http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjGvsUwXnLY&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz

Also, listening to favorite songs, songs you share with friends and significant others, and high energy songs are all great choices :]

Sugar List: Sometimes, we just need a little sweetness in our life, to make it better.
1) 69 cent ice cream cones from McDonalds
2) Oreos
3) Milanos (and other Pepperidge Farm deliciousness)
4) Cookie Dough
5) Ice cream, of your choice
6) Custard Cup (Be nostalgic. Get the Teddy Cup)
7) Chocolate
8) Halloween Candy (Halloween is in 8 days, it counts)
9) Bake something sweet!
10) Dairy Queen blizzards

Good Deeds: Sometimes, doing something good for others will pull yourself out of your pity party (not to say pity parties are bad! I have them all the time. But you have to get out them eventually)
1) Volunteer somewhere short term, like a soup kitchen, a Virginia Theater performance, cleaning a park or street, etc.
2) Make a gift, card, locker note, etc. for someone you know who is also super stressed
3) Give hugs, high fives, friendly handshakes, a wave, whatever your action of affection is :]

Healthy Outlets: Violence is not the answer. Here are some healthy ways to channel all the frustration, anger, sadness, or listlessness you might be feeling.
1) Go outside at night and stare at the stars.
2) Write some poetry or music.
3) Yell at an inanimate object.
4) Eat some sugar/healthy snack
5) Go for a quick run
6) Listen to some music
7) Call a friend/Talk to your parents or a sibling for ten minutes and spill all your angst
8) Drink some tea (stay away from coffee or soda, especially late at night)
9) Beat a pillow
10) Take a quick nap (hour tops)

Hope this helps some. And of course, I love listening to people, so if you ever feel like you can't talk to anyone in CU, remember you have a very understanding and very loving PCC here in G-Burg who would love to talk to you, if you need it :]

Much Love,
Celinda <3

Guest Blog: Life at Parkland with Stef!

So, guess what??
Guest blog!! An amazing one at that :]
When I last saw my dearest Stefanie Senior, we were eating at Casablanca and talking about college. She had just started, and I was going to move in a couple of days. Just listening to her, she seemed to be having a blast. The question is, how is she now? Well read on and find out!

ADVENTURES IN PARKLAND-LAND

EPISODE ONE: MIDTERM

Or, Things I Have Learned in Nine Weeks at Parkland

Here I am: Halfway through my first semester of college. First of all, what the hell happened to the last seven weeks? I mean, I shouldn’t have lost that much time between school, work, homework, rehearsals, auditions, light hangs/work days... never mind.

Anyway, back to the real focus of this article- things I’ve learned at Parkland (so far).

1. Nobody Gives a Shit Where You Went to School

In my first couple weeks at Parkland, I spent a lot of time recanting stories of high school (what else did I have to talk about?), which of course prompted the question, “Where did you go to high school?”

Now, coming from Uni, I was used to an environment where school became your label (“He’s Princeton, she’s WashU, he’s Harvard”, etc.), so I got a little nervous answering this question. I was worried that I might be excluded or teased for being from Uni: “Oh, do you think you’re better than us? You’re SOOOO smart!”

Guess what really happened?

“Where’d you go to high school?”

“Uni.”

“Oh, so you’re a smart kid?”

“Well...sure.”

“Oh, that’s cool. Wanna get some lunch?”

I mean, that’s pretty much it. Nobody really cared that I went to Uni. Nobody thought I had lowered my standards by coming to Parkland; nobody thought I was going to be condescending and rude, just because I went to a “smart-kid school”. The attitude was, (and is!) “Whatever, that’s high school; this is college.”

Go figure.

2. College is Some Serious Shit.

Coming from Uni, it’s really easy to assign values to everything- especially school subjects. It’s easy to say, “English doesn’t matter because I have Calculus to do,” or “I can do that tomorrow- I have to do this right now,” or “I’m pretty much only doing this because it looks good, not because I care about it.”

Even as a very dedicated theatre student, it was very easy to write something off as “It’s ‘just’ rehearsal,” or “It’s ‘just’ a high school show,” which is nice when you’re trying to keep yourself from going crazy, but not so nice if it’s something you actually have to take seriously.

Then, I got to Parkland. I’m still in the process of convincing myself that acting is a perfectly viable career option and not something I do for fun.

I suppose this is the long way of saying that nothing I’m doing in Parkland theatre and none of the people I’ve met and worked with in Parkland theatre make me feel like I’m wasting my time. My acting teacher never talks about acting as a “last resort career”; she tells us about her experience with professional acting and, without bullshitting us, gives us advice about how to make our potential acting careers the best they can be.

I don’t ever feel like I’m surrounded by people who don’t care. Unlike high school, there seems to be no such thing as caring “too much”. In fact, it frequently seems as though the most frustration and impatience is directed towards those students who don’t seem to care enough- which, for me, is rather refreshing.

3. Growing Up is Hard to Do...

There is nothing quite like watching yourself grow up. It’s very weird- it’s like having an out of body experience for which you are completely present. Since going to Parkland, I’ve had to do a fair amount of growing up. I got a job two weeks before school started, so now I’m making my own money and paying for my own things instead of having my mom pay for everything (most of the time, that’s nice, unless it’s things like car repair bills). Short of living on my own, I’m pretty autonomous: I have my own car and a completely separate schedule from my mom, who is also going to work and school at the same time. Our living situation sometimes seems like roommates rather than mother-daughter, because between work, school, rehearsals, and homework, not to mention attempting a social life, we hardly see each other.

I’m taking more charge of my life now, which is both nice and scary. And the future is sort of looming in on me in a similar “sounds-both-exciting-and-scary” kind of way.

But never fear! It isn’t all bad. Most of it is actually really fun- as long as you remember to enjoy it. Don’t ever, ever, EVER micromanage the fun out of your life. College and your own personal coming-of-age will both be fun experiences, if you let them.

These are three of the biggest things I’ve learned at Parkland, but they are by no means the only things. I learn new things every day at Parkland- things mechanical, technical, practical; but also things theoretical, hypothetical, existential, and everything in between. I’m fortunate enough to be surrounded by instructors and mentors both that I respect and that treat me with respect;  to study with students who are just as passionate about their theatre education as I am about mine; and to have my friend circle filled with new and interesting people, all of whom force me to think and stretch my intellectual and professional capacity more than I could ever have believed.

And it’s only been 9 weeks. 

Much Love,

Celinda (And Stef!!)

Weekly Roundup 6

WHOA??

Six weeks??????????????????

5 Best Things This Week:
1) Preregistered for classes! School and Society, Elementary Spanish 2, and Judaism, Christianity, and Islam :D
2) No classes Wednesday! Whoo Fall Institute!
3) Philosophizing/dancing on park benches with Odessa
4) I got paid today!
5) I got to do a prospective lunch all by myself (I am all grown up)

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) I might get closed out of some of my classes, especially the School and Society class
2) I was super sick--my eyes were burning for two days straight
3) I saved all my homework for Thursday night
4) I haven't been doing APO stuff this week, including missing chapter
5) I couldn't go to the Boys and Girls Club on Tuesday because I didn't want to get them sick

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
Me in the Caf, always. Spilling food, forgetting silverware, squirting oranges, saying weird things, dancing, tripping, running into people. ALL OF IT.

Words of Wisdom:
Search for happiness, because there is so much sad in this world, we need to find the joys. Watch sunrises. Cuddle puppies. Fall in love. Laugh at bad jokes. Dance in the rain. Hug your friends. Discover your hidden talents. Do nothing. Do everything. Live your life, because there is so much that the world has to offer!

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Cold medicine. I was suffering so badly, I was near tears
2) iPod. Love listening to music and dancing around the suite area. JBiebs is my homeboy :D
3) Hot tea. My throat hurt really bad this week, and also it helped keep me warm on blustery days!

Best Food Item This Week:
The chicken alfredo is a real winner, winner, chicken dinner :D
...
Shut up I'm tired :P

Plans For the Weekend:
It's Parent's Weekend!!! My mom and my sister are here, AS WE SPEAK. My dad and my stepmom are coming tomorrow. Fun weekend! Also, on the icky note, I have another bio midterm this coming Friday where I literally have to memorize like 50 phyla...

Much Love,
Celinda! (PS, I will try to blog more this coming week, sorry I was such a lazy bum...)

(PPS, We had Revathi Appreciation Day yesterday, where we pretty much celebrated Revathi's existence. While it was great celebrating her, it also brought us Uni kids together, which was amazing and beautiful :])

Weekly Roundup 5 (Halfway Done!)

Oh.My.GOSH.
I am officially halfway done with my first term here at Knox College! Mind=blown. And now the weekly roundup!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I got an A- on my Biology midterm!
2) Laying out under the stars talking with my friend Odessa
3) Having a guy who works at the gaming store and does graphic design offer to make personalized bingo cards for Blessing's fundraiser for free :D
4) Having dinner with my Big (a current member who acts as a mentor/friend for a pledge) for APO, as well as receiving chocolate from her :]
5) Getting married on Wednesday!

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) Doing virtually no homework Wednesday, so I had a ton last night
2) I had an awful dream Sunday night, which brought up all these feeling on Monday. I was sobbing all throughout the day.
3) Spending a lot of my Dining Dollars this week
4) Feeling pressured to like a guy I can't even say two words to
5) Getting cravings for like ten different food items at ten different restaurants, none of which are found in Galesburg

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
I actually have no truly embarrassing things to share...Which is totally awesome!!

Words of Wisdom:
It's okay to be sad. I had sadness that was really different from homesickness. I just had a really hard day. And that's okay. Life can be hard sometimes. Things can go wrong, you can get bad grades, you can get into a fight, you can have a bunch of feelings just well up in you, anything. Surround yourself with good people, chocolate, music, writing, yelling at the sky, running, whatever you do to channel all that emotion. Sadness is just as natural to the human condition as happiness is, and it is NOT less legitimate. And, if you see someone sad, reach out to them. Get them a little treat, a little note, take them out and about, be their shoulder to cry on, JUST BE THERE. The only way we can make it through hard times is if we reach out to each other and help each other out.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Thick Sweaters. It got super cold, so it's nice to have a big sweater to snuggle in. It also poured the other day, and my sweater captured all the moisture and kept me dry!
2) Coffee. A couple late nights. A couple bio classes where I would not have survived without my coffee. Enough said, moving on.
3) Skype. I have been skyping my lovely friends from Uni High this week, and it's been super useful to keep in contact!

Best Food Item in the Caf:
Granola, with craisins and sliced banana in it. It's super healthy, sweet, filling, and delicious :D

Plans for the Weekend:
REVISING. I have a final draft a paper due Monday. EEK. I also have to catch up on my biology reading blegh. Socially, I have an APO alumni party tomorrow, then an APO pledge meeting Sunday, followed by the chapter meeting. Super APOness this weekend.

And that concludes HALF A TERM at Knox College! WHOOT WHOOT!

Muchos Love,
Celinda :D