Perfection is Overrated: The Dark Side to My Fall Term

November is a busy month. It is a time reasonable people stop shaving and write 50,000 worded novels instead. Which is to say that November is a month for psychopaths. November was both the busiest and laziest of months for me. I took finals, became and active member of Alpha Phi Omega, finished projects, and came home. After becoming as lazy as humanly possible (sleeping until 4 in the afternoon, eating and playing on the computer until 4 in the morning, sleep, repeat), I'm back to blogging. Sorry it's been awhile.

Unfortunately, I'm blogging about less than pleasant topics today. Specifically, the three things I found disappointing or difficult about this past term. Don't worry though, I will end on a positive note. I will suggest three possible solutions to my problems that I hope to implement come January.

1) Boys
I have guy friends that I care about, that I hang out with, and that I hope care about me. But I know myself. I really like skirts and dresses. I like sports and I can become a crazy intense fan, but I don't follow or understand sports religiously. I have an annoying tendency to gossip sometimes. So yes, I do tend to roll with a lot of females. Yet this term has had an excessive lack of testosterone, enough missing for even me to notice. Part of that is an issue of exposure. I live in an all-girl's dorm (I chose it because it's cleaner and closer to the hub of campus), I volunteer with kids (don't get your panties twisted, it's true that volunteering, especially with adolescents, is skewed towards females), I don't go to parties, and I don't do any real extracurriculars like student publication or student government or god forbid ultimate frisbee. Add to that a healthy dose of shyness. Why yes, you might have missed that with my loud voice in the hallways, my penchant for raising my hand in class, and my general sarcasm and open-book policy with my blog. HOWEVER, when I meet new people or when I meet what I call real teenagers, I close up and turn into a wallflower. So, forcing myself to talk to people beyond "What's your name?", "Where are you from?", and "What classes are you taking?" have been hard enough. And, I've been successful--when it comes to girls. But, boys? They're like a different species! Combining the fact I've gotten comfortable with the friends I have, I've been dating for the past 2 years, and I went to Uni, I have no clue how to talk to an 18 year old boy. Hell with flirting, I would just like a guy friend beyond passing acquaintance. If that isn't hard enough, I watched as not one, not two, but at least like 10 different people I knew get into relationships. It's like a whirlwind. Are relationships supposed to pop out of the snow, like daisies?? I know how fast the friendships form, but god forbid, dating? Why isn't there a manual to all of this??

2) Loneliness
Fiona said it perfectly on Friday, at the alumni panel "Prepare to feel extremely lonely, even when surrounded by tons of people". Even with making friends and settling into the rhythm of academia, I have felt unbearably lonely more times than I can count. Maybe I'm doing this college thing wrong, because it seems that all my other friends at other schools have found their strides. I could be wrong. But, it hits you so starkly. I think I notice how lonely I am because it's been a real long time since I have felt so lonely. Even at Uni's worst, I was part of a community. I had friends, but I had friends. Friends that I have had for years, who I never felt self-conscious turning to. Then suddenly, I am thrown into a new school and orientation, where I probably met a hundred people or more. I've never felt so damn lonely. Loneliness sucks, because it makes me self-conscious and unsure. Instead of looking in the mirror and saying "Really, really Uni?? A Bio test and a Shakespeare paper due on the same day??" and not worrying necessarily how you looked or what you said or did that day, you become super aware of yourself. You look in the mirror and go "Hair really?? You want to look like that? Are my arms getting chubbier? I sounded so snobby and elitist yesterday. And didn't even make eye contact with that guy. You can't live in the world of academia completely, you need human connection..." and it goes on forever. Loneliness seems to eat up all the joys you had about moving on to the next stage of your life, of being free and adult-like, of experiencing a world bigger than Uni could ever offer. And on the flipside, I felt lonely, and wanting to be left alone at the same time. There are people everywhere. I even live with a roommate! Don't get me wrong, she's great, but OMG there are people everywhere in this world and I have never wanted quiet so much as those ten weeks at college. And if you know me even a little, you would now that is very strange indeed.

3) Drinking
I have many things to be thankful for, so don't take this (or this whole post) as a place for me to whine about my awful middle class experience. That being said, I've had to deal with alcoholism firsthand growing up. It sucks. Things are better now, but when I went off to college, I made a promise to myself: no alcohol. It has nothing to do with a better than thou attitude. Obviously people drink their entire lives without abusing alcohol. I'm not naive. However, I never want to lose control of myself, I and never want to regret anything. Not saying if you drink you will automatically become a jerk. Some may wonder what the problem is--I made a promise and I kept it. The problem is all the gray areas and mini panic attacks I have been having all term. No one has pressured me to drink. But I see many freshmen getting dressed up to go out and party hard on the weekends, and there is something shiny about it all. They're out having a blast while I sit at home. Weekend after weekend. Maybe this alcohol thing isn't awful. So I picture myself having one drink, just one drink, and I spaz. Why? I'm breaking my promise. Mixing loneliness and my overactive guilt complex (seriously, my mom says i have more guilt than a devout Catholic) has created a momentous problem in my brain. To drink or not to drink? It's even worse than that though. I can't go partying even sober, because I hate dealing with drunk people. A lot of people think drunk people are funny, but I only see something incredibly depressing. Their words slur together, they're eyes are overbright, they sound stupid, they stumble around like they are just learning to walk for the first time, they puke, and they wake up in the morning cranky and worse for wear. I hate the idea of dealing with that (I would of course for a friend. And probably a stranger. DARN IT). I hate the idea of even bumping into it at parties. So, it's become an overwhelming problem in my brain.

And now, some solutions :]

1) A simple smile would go a long way, wouldn't it? Basic eye contact? Yep. And maybe the knowledge that at one point, all the guys at Uni were once so foreign and male. Well, maybe just foreign (ZING! Emasculated you all lol). I'd like to tell you a little story. Once, I was leaving Computer Literacy 1 at the same time Seth Bull was. He accidentally spilled papers all over the floor. I bent down to help him out. When he smiled and said thanks, I ran. Yeah, not my proudest moment. Now? I talk to good old Sethy, no problem. And I am his and his lovely girlfriend's biggest fan/third wheel :] The point of that story I guess is to remind myself, and other shy people out there, that everyone is a bumbling fool for a while. It took me a year to really friend anybody beyond "What period do you have English" shtick. When it comes down to it, why are you friends with the people in your group? I hope it's because they are funny, and nice, and smart, and they just kind of get you. The point where you can say ONE word, or one phrase, or even look at each other and burst out laughing. However, if you are just sitting there, a mess of nerves, trying desperately to strike the balance between wit and adorable, you can bet your bottom dollar you're going to come off as TRYING TOO HARD. First step in January? Smile, eye contact, and myself. Cause if anyone, guy or girl, doesn't like me as myself, they aren't worth my time.

2) Kicking loneliness to the curb takes time. I wanted to go back to Montessori throughout my entire Subbie year. Now, I want to go back to Uni. Change is hard. Soon though, the change becomes routine. Time heals. There will be a time when I will want to go back to Knox, cause eww, real world?? The point is, to get rid of loneliness, I need to keep being active. Continue to hang out and get to know the friends I'm making. Rent more movies and watch them with friends. Study more in groups. Have sleepovers. Stay active in my volunteering. Smile at the person I sit next to in my classes next term. The point is, friendships aren't born overnight. Obviously, there was a time when I didn't know my Uni friends well: I even thought for two weeks that Rachael was Heather and Heather was Rachael. Loneliness comes with new surroundings. It won't be smiles and rainbows when I go back in January, but really, I have to start somewhere. And when I feel lonely, I will remember the times I wanted to be alone and savor it. CAUSE I REALLY LIKE QUIET GUYS.

3) This is in some ways the toughest nut to crack. However, I have a theory. Almost any job you take, neighborhood/apartment you live in, or even yoga class you take, there will be at least one person that YOU CAN'T STAND. They're so annoying. Maybe they're nosy, or whiny, or extremely racist, or smell really bad, whatever. You can either wake up every morning loathing their existence in your world, or you can be a reasonable human being and know they don't truly affect you unless you let them. The same can apply to drinking. I don't have to drink. I am keeping that promise to myself, because building trust and goals and limits starts with yourself. But, I think I will go out more. I'm a single, average, seventeen year old female. I can go out, dance with my friends, dress up in those pretty skirts I was talking about earlier, and enjoy myself. I won't let drunk people psych me out. I know that if I see someone in need, I will have to put aside my childhood scars and my morbid fear of vomit and help them out. That could be just my enlarged nurture gene talking (seriously guys, it's a problem), but I like to think it's more about just growing up and dealing with problems head on. I won't go out every weekend. I will probably still choose a nice, quiet evening at home over partying CAUSE I REALLY LIKE QUIET GUYS. Like the other two problems, this problem won't just evaporate. But, when life throws curveballs, it takes a certain amount of adaptation. That, my dear Watson, is the human quality of growing up and maturing.

So, that's it. I hope I didn't bore you to tears. I hope you aren't sitting there saying "Where's the Beef" (Seriously guys, if you get NOTHING else from this blog, watch this. LOL I appreciate her doggedness. They aren't built like that anymore, I'll tell yah http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ug75diEyiA0). An overall moral could be, college isn't perfect, and there are going to be problems. It's a new stage in life, and while it's wonderful blah blah blah, it sucks a lot too. And you know what? It's okay to admit that college isn't smooth sailing. If it is, stop bragging, you lucky jerk :P

Much Love, despite that last sentiment,
Celinda <3

Weekly Roundup 8 (WHAT?)

I know, I know. It's late. Moving on.

8 Weeks?? How did that happen? I tell you, sometimes it seems like school is crawling by, then BAM. You realize you're writing your 8th weekly roundup. Crazy talk.

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I think I did well on my Spanish test!
2) I went to a Slam Poetry Fest AND the fall play twice. Culture!
3) I got into all three classes I wanted for next term! School and Society, Judaism, Christianity and Islam, and Elementary Spanish 2 :]
4) I had another prospective lunch, that was fun
5) I did better in lab this week

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) EWWW it got cold and wet all of a sudden!
2) I almost got hit by a car on Thursday
3) I am falling behind on blog posts!
4) I was feeling kind of awkward and lame at the Membership Event for APO
5) I didn't really do anything yesterday hw-wise, so I have to do it all this morning while doing laundry

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
Probably on Friday. I was walking with confidence and happiness. Part of that was the large iced mocha I had consumed earlier that day, but there isn't any need to dwell on such minute details (lol). Anyway, I was feeling pretty good about myself. That is key you understand, because I walked with purpose up half the steps to get into the Old Main building before I tripped. The woman behind me asked if I was okay, and I reassured her. I then tried to turn it into a self-deprecating joke, because if you can't laugh at yourself, then life is truly hard. However, she just looked at me stoned-face and didn't APPRECIATE my self-deprecation. Such an awkward minute of my life...

Words of Wisdom:
Avoid gossip and drama. I have to say, it can be so interesting, so tantalizing to gossip. I have been doing it a lot lately, and I am so disappointed in myself. You feel secretive and powerful, gossiping with a friend. It's an easy way out of dealing with issues you have with people. You can gossip about the WORST person in the world. They can be mean, bitchy, cruel, unfunny, etc. and YET. Yet you are stooping to their level, because you are creating thoughtlessness and unnecessary cruelty in this world. It can be addicting to gossip, but sooner or later, it will come to a person and hurt them, or you will hear something cruel and mean about you. It hurts doesn't it? To have someone whittle all the complexities of your being down to a few labels, to just your flaws. Gossip strips away someone's dignity and their complexities, and the worse part is, they don't even know. They can't even defend themselves from the secret whispers, the shadowy cruelties. Please, don't gossip. I am trying to center myself, to stop gossiping. Really, there is enough ugly in the world, don't add to it.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Warm blankets. It was so darn cold this week. Ohmygoodness. You need warm blankets for the cold (Shorts and fans for those hotter days, especially if you are going south).
2) Classmates. I swear to God I bought one of my books for class, but apparently not. Fortunately I was able to borrow a classmate's.
3) Nap. I know, I am the crazy girl who gets up early and goes to bed early now, but trust me. Sometimes, you feel incredibly sad, incredibly burnt out, incredibly tired, or incredibly angry. Taking a nap CAN be a good thing. It recharges you and lets your mind rest. Don't be afraid to take a nap, just be smart about when and how long you take one.

Most Interesting Discovery This Week:
Academic: Sherlock Holmes had a cocaine addiction? Why didn't I know this?
Social: Slam Poetry Fests are tons of fun. However, people actually clap at them, not snap. And here I was practicing my snapping....

Best Food Item in the Caf:
Okay, it didn't happen this week, but he makes fried cheese ravioli, and it is so good you don't even need a sauce on it. I eat mine plain. MMMMMMMMMM

Plans for the Weekend:
Well. It's Sunday. AWKWARD. On Friday night I went to the play, which was Mary Stuart (very cool stuff). I slept in Saturday, then took a nap, so I didn't really do hw, but I helped make the APO pinata, and then I went to dinner and the play again with my big (my mom-type person in APO). Today, I am going to PEORIA! Shopping and getting out of Galesburg galore!

And that my friends, is another edge-of-your-seat week with Celinda!
 
Much Love,
Celinda :]

Weekly Roundup 7 (A little late...)

Sorry this is coming out  a day late. I was super, super busy yesterday, from like 7:50 until 9:30, and by time I got home, I was too exhausted. ALSO, I left my computer on all yesterday afternoon unplugged, so I found it with 7% battery...SKILLS.

Now, the Weekly Roundup!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) Getting to go back to the Boys and Girls Club :]
2) Kicking ass on my Bio midterm and my Spanish oral exam
3) Hanging out with my APO family today!
4) Going to my first Knox football game (see 3)
5) Eating healthier (minus the cookie dough in my fridge I mean what?)

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) Studying over 10 hours for bio this week
2) Not getting a lot of sleep
3) Having a fundraiser yesterday with Blessings that NO ONE came to :[
4) Getting back a Spanish test with a less than stellar grade
5) Not getting to have a real meal in the Caf all of Tuesday

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
Apparently, Knox is a very hipster school. Which is generally fine, I guess. But apparently it doesn't fly that I wanted to go as a hipster for Halloween. Oh well, I can't find my hipster glasses, so last minute costume change y'all

Words of Wisdom:
Develop good study habits/time management. Soon, I will make a blog about different styles of studying, plus advice and personal stories. College is different because you have less classes, and they don't meet everyday, so how you study and get your hw done is going to change. Keep a look out for that blog! (I promise I will do it)

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Study music. I can't listen to my favorite music AND study well, so now I have 50 minutes worth of thunderstorm/rain sounds on my iPod. Also, classical or anything instrumental is nice--just avoid lyrics :]
2) Post it Notes. I leave myself little reminders, or upbeat messages such as "You have this test! Whoo!! Go Celinda! You kick Bio ASS :] WHOOOO!!"
3) Carry-out. Knox has a system for carry out dinners, where you use a plastic carry out thing, and take out food from the Caf. When you are ready to take out again, you bring the old one in to be washed and grab a new one. Helpful for my busy week where I didn't have time to sit down for a meal, AND environmentally friendly.

Most Interesting Discovery This Week (SORRY I have been leaving this out recently! I didn't even notice!):
Academic: Our closest relative is a choanoflagellate!
Social: My Little Pony is the shiz here :D

Best Food Item in the Caf:
I've been digging the different kinds of chicken. He made chipotle chicken on Thursday, and it was really, really good :] For vegetarians, the cheese-stuffed shells have also been completing my life :D

Plans for the Weekend:
Well, the weekend has already started. I had a fundraiser yesterday (LOL), football game/hot drinks date with my APO family today, I also am going to Improv Club's comedy show tonight, then trick or treating, then frat parties. Tomorrow, I have APO :] So, busy, busy

Seven. Weeks. Hell. Yes.

Much Love,
Celinda

I Got Dem Midterm Blues

Stress.

Procrastination.

The  middle or so of the term can be difficult. I started feeling it in like November at Uni. Here, I am feeling it now. We also just had parent's weekend, so I feel both stress and a bit of homesickness. The energy I was putting into my work has all but dissipated. I'm looking at this week with such lethargy, it's killing me. I have a bio midterm this Friday, plus just general homework is getting to me. I don't want to do ANYTHING. All I want to do is go home, and sleep. That's it. Blegh college sometimes.

Just like at Uni, it's okay to get the mid-term blues. School is getting intense, and overwhelming at times. It also doesn't seem to ever stop. Break seems so close, yet.so.far. This is often the time people will get sick from late nights and not drinking enough water and feeling stress. The same activities you had so much passion for a couple of weeks ago just seem like annoying obligations. With all this negative, it's hard to pull yourself up and get your "second wind" so to speak. Here, for me and for you, I present several things to get through midterm blues!

Sunshine Playlist: Oftentimes, the weather is getting cold and miserable, school is droning on, responsibilities are piling up, and all you want to do is sleep. Here is a sunshine playlist!
 1) Pocketful of Sunshine, by Natasha Bedingfield http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gte3BoXKwP0&ob=av2e
2) Three Little Birds, by Bob Marley http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LanCLS_hIo4&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
3) Smile, by Uncle Kracker http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eskXnbVYr3Y&feature=mh_lolz&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13
4) Ac-cent-tchu-ate the Positive, by Aretha Franklin (cover) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IP9h40z0sk&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
5) You are my Sunshine http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc2jsjnt-HY&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
6) Put Your Records On, by Corrine Bailey Rae http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkEeNpWMvgk&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
7) Here Comes the Sun, The Beatles http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6tV11acSRk&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
8) Wavin' Flag, by K'Naan http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amXeJrA-wDc&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
9) Walkin' On Sunshine, by Katrina and the Waves http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPUmE-tne5U&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
10) What a Wonderful World, by Louis Armstrong http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5TwT69i1lU&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
11) Hey Ya!, by Outkast http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWgvGjAhvIw&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz
12) Joy and Pain, by Maze http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjGvsUwXnLY&feature=BFa&list=PLA26EBF71C4C43D13&lf=mh_lolz

Also, listening to favorite songs, songs you share with friends and significant others, and high energy songs are all great choices :]

Sugar List: Sometimes, we just need a little sweetness in our life, to make it better.
1) 69 cent ice cream cones from McDonalds
2) Oreos
3) Milanos (and other Pepperidge Farm deliciousness)
4) Cookie Dough
5) Ice cream, of your choice
6) Custard Cup (Be nostalgic. Get the Teddy Cup)
7) Chocolate
8) Halloween Candy (Halloween is in 8 days, it counts)
9) Bake something sweet!
10) Dairy Queen blizzards

Good Deeds: Sometimes, doing something good for others will pull yourself out of your pity party (not to say pity parties are bad! I have them all the time. But you have to get out them eventually)
1) Volunteer somewhere short term, like a soup kitchen, a Virginia Theater performance, cleaning a park or street, etc.
2) Make a gift, card, locker note, etc. for someone you know who is also super stressed
3) Give hugs, high fives, friendly handshakes, a wave, whatever your action of affection is :]

Healthy Outlets: Violence is not the answer. Here are some healthy ways to channel all the frustration, anger, sadness, or listlessness you might be feeling.
1) Go outside at night and stare at the stars.
2) Write some poetry or music.
3) Yell at an inanimate object.
4) Eat some sugar/healthy snack
5) Go for a quick run
6) Listen to some music
7) Call a friend/Talk to your parents or a sibling for ten minutes and spill all your angst
8) Drink some tea (stay away from coffee or soda, especially late at night)
9) Beat a pillow
10) Take a quick nap (hour tops)

Hope this helps some. And of course, I love listening to people, so if you ever feel like you can't talk to anyone in CU, remember you have a very understanding and very loving PCC here in G-Burg who would love to talk to you, if you need it :]

Much Love,
Celinda <3

Guest Blog: Life at Parkland with Stef!

So, guess what??
Guest blog!! An amazing one at that :]
When I last saw my dearest Stefanie Senior, we were eating at Casablanca and talking about college. She had just started, and I was going to move in a couple of days. Just listening to her, she seemed to be having a blast. The question is, how is she now? Well read on and find out!

ADVENTURES IN PARKLAND-LAND

EPISODE ONE: MIDTERM

Or, Things I Have Learned in Nine Weeks at Parkland

Here I am: Halfway through my first semester of college. First of all, what the hell happened to the last seven weeks? I mean, I shouldn’t have lost that much time between school, work, homework, rehearsals, auditions, light hangs/work days... never mind.

Anyway, back to the real focus of this article- things I’ve learned at Parkland (so far).

1. Nobody Gives a Shit Where You Went to School

In my first couple weeks at Parkland, I spent a lot of time recanting stories of high school (what else did I have to talk about?), which of course prompted the question, “Where did you go to high school?”

Now, coming from Uni, I was used to an environment where school became your label (“He’s Princeton, she’s WashU, he’s Harvard”, etc.), so I got a little nervous answering this question. I was worried that I might be excluded or teased for being from Uni: “Oh, do you think you’re better than us? You’re SOOOO smart!”

Guess what really happened?

“Where’d you go to high school?”

“Uni.”

“Oh, so you’re a smart kid?”

“Well...sure.”

“Oh, that’s cool. Wanna get some lunch?”

I mean, that’s pretty much it. Nobody really cared that I went to Uni. Nobody thought I had lowered my standards by coming to Parkland; nobody thought I was going to be condescending and rude, just because I went to a “smart-kid school”. The attitude was, (and is!) “Whatever, that’s high school; this is college.”

Go figure.

2. College is Some Serious Shit.

Coming from Uni, it’s really easy to assign values to everything- especially school subjects. It’s easy to say, “English doesn’t matter because I have Calculus to do,” or “I can do that tomorrow- I have to do this right now,” or “I’m pretty much only doing this because it looks good, not because I care about it.”

Even as a very dedicated theatre student, it was very easy to write something off as “It’s ‘just’ rehearsal,” or “It’s ‘just’ a high school show,” which is nice when you’re trying to keep yourself from going crazy, but not so nice if it’s something you actually have to take seriously.

Then, I got to Parkland. I’m still in the process of convincing myself that acting is a perfectly viable career option and not something I do for fun.

I suppose this is the long way of saying that nothing I’m doing in Parkland theatre and none of the people I’ve met and worked with in Parkland theatre make me feel like I’m wasting my time. My acting teacher never talks about acting as a “last resort career”; she tells us about her experience with professional acting and, without bullshitting us, gives us advice about how to make our potential acting careers the best they can be.

I don’t ever feel like I’m surrounded by people who don’t care. Unlike high school, there seems to be no such thing as caring “too much”. In fact, it frequently seems as though the most frustration and impatience is directed towards those students who don’t seem to care enough- which, for me, is rather refreshing.

3. Growing Up is Hard to Do...

There is nothing quite like watching yourself grow up. It’s very weird- it’s like having an out of body experience for which you are completely present. Since going to Parkland, I’ve had to do a fair amount of growing up. I got a job two weeks before school started, so now I’m making my own money and paying for my own things instead of having my mom pay for everything (most of the time, that’s nice, unless it’s things like car repair bills). Short of living on my own, I’m pretty autonomous: I have my own car and a completely separate schedule from my mom, who is also going to work and school at the same time. Our living situation sometimes seems like roommates rather than mother-daughter, because between work, school, rehearsals, and homework, not to mention attempting a social life, we hardly see each other.

I’m taking more charge of my life now, which is both nice and scary. And the future is sort of looming in on me in a similar “sounds-both-exciting-and-scary” kind of way.

But never fear! It isn’t all bad. Most of it is actually really fun- as long as you remember to enjoy it. Don’t ever, ever, EVER micromanage the fun out of your life. College and your own personal coming-of-age will both be fun experiences, if you let them.

These are three of the biggest things I’ve learned at Parkland, but they are by no means the only things. I learn new things every day at Parkland- things mechanical, technical, practical; but also things theoretical, hypothetical, existential, and everything in between. I’m fortunate enough to be surrounded by instructors and mentors both that I respect and that treat me with respect;  to study with students who are just as passionate about their theatre education as I am about mine; and to have my friend circle filled with new and interesting people, all of whom force me to think and stretch my intellectual and professional capacity more than I could ever have believed.

And it’s only been 9 weeks. 

Much Love,

Celinda (And Stef!!)

Weekly Roundup 6

WHOA??

Six weeks??????????????????

5 Best Things This Week:
1) Preregistered for classes! School and Society, Elementary Spanish 2, and Judaism, Christianity, and Islam :D
2) No classes Wednesday! Whoo Fall Institute!
3) Philosophizing/dancing on park benches with Odessa
4) I got paid today!
5) I got to do a prospective lunch all by myself (I am all grown up)

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) I might get closed out of some of my classes, especially the School and Society class
2) I was super sick--my eyes were burning for two days straight
3) I saved all my homework for Thursday night
4) I haven't been doing APO stuff this week, including missing chapter
5) I couldn't go to the Boys and Girls Club on Tuesday because I didn't want to get them sick

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
Me in the Caf, always. Spilling food, forgetting silverware, squirting oranges, saying weird things, dancing, tripping, running into people. ALL OF IT.

Words of Wisdom:
Search for happiness, because there is so much sad in this world, we need to find the joys. Watch sunrises. Cuddle puppies. Fall in love. Laugh at bad jokes. Dance in the rain. Hug your friends. Discover your hidden talents. Do nothing. Do everything. Live your life, because there is so much that the world has to offer!

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Cold medicine. I was suffering so badly, I was near tears
2) iPod. Love listening to music and dancing around the suite area. JBiebs is my homeboy :D
3) Hot tea. My throat hurt really bad this week, and also it helped keep me warm on blustery days!

Best Food Item This Week:
The chicken alfredo is a real winner, winner, chicken dinner :D
...
Shut up I'm tired :P

Plans For the Weekend:
It's Parent's Weekend!!! My mom and my sister are here, AS WE SPEAK. My dad and my stepmom are coming tomorrow. Fun weekend! Also, on the icky note, I have another bio midterm this coming Friday where I literally have to memorize like 50 phyla...

Much Love,
Celinda! (PS, I will try to blog more this coming week, sorry I was such a lazy bum...)

(PPS, We had Revathi Appreciation Day yesterday, where we pretty much celebrated Revathi's existence. While it was great celebrating her, it also brought us Uni kids together, which was amazing and beautiful :])

Weekly Roundup 5 (Halfway Done!)

Oh.My.GOSH.
I am officially halfway done with my first term here at Knox College! Mind=blown. And now the weekly roundup!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I got an A- on my Biology midterm!
2) Laying out under the stars talking with my friend Odessa
3) Having a guy who works at the gaming store and does graphic design offer to make personalized bingo cards for Blessing's fundraiser for free :D
4) Having dinner with my Big (a current member who acts as a mentor/friend for a pledge) for APO, as well as receiving chocolate from her :]
5) Getting married on Wednesday!

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) Doing virtually no homework Wednesday, so I had a ton last night
2) I had an awful dream Sunday night, which brought up all these feeling on Monday. I was sobbing all throughout the day.
3) Spending a lot of my Dining Dollars this week
4) Feeling pressured to like a guy I can't even say two words to
5) Getting cravings for like ten different food items at ten different restaurants, none of which are found in Galesburg

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
I actually have no truly embarrassing things to share...Which is totally awesome!!

Words of Wisdom:
It's okay to be sad. I had sadness that was really different from homesickness. I just had a really hard day. And that's okay. Life can be hard sometimes. Things can go wrong, you can get bad grades, you can get into a fight, you can have a bunch of feelings just well up in you, anything. Surround yourself with good people, chocolate, music, writing, yelling at the sky, running, whatever you do to channel all that emotion. Sadness is just as natural to the human condition as happiness is, and it is NOT less legitimate. And, if you see someone sad, reach out to them. Get them a little treat, a little note, take them out and about, be their shoulder to cry on, JUST BE THERE. The only way we can make it through hard times is if we reach out to each other and help each other out.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Thick Sweaters. It got super cold, so it's nice to have a big sweater to snuggle in. It also poured the other day, and my sweater captured all the moisture and kept me dry!
2) Coffee. A couple late nights. A couple bio classes where I would not have survived without my coffee. Enough said, moving on.
3) Skype. I have been skyping my lovely friends from Uni High this week, and it's been super useful to keep in contact!

Best Food Item in the Caf:
Granola, with craisins and sliced banana in it. It's super healthy, sweet, filling, and delicious :D

Plans for the Weekend:
REVISING. I have a final draft a paper due Monday. EEK. I also have to catch up on my biology reading blegh. Socially, I have an APO alumni party tomorrow, then an APO pledge meeting Sunday, followed by the chapter meeting. Super APOness this weekend.

And that concludes HALF A TERM at Knox College! WHOOT WHOOT!

Muchos Love,
Celinda :D

Weekly Roundup 4 (A Whole Month!)

Wow! I have been here over a month, and in classes for a month. Time is going by so fast. And since I am on a ten week trimester system, I am 40% done with my term.
HOW DID THAT HAPPEN??
Anyways, here is the weekly roundup!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I kicked ass on my Spanish Exam today
2) I joined a new club called Blessings in a Backpack. Basically, they fill backpacks with food for kids who don't get enough to eat over the weekend, so they have food in their belly when school starts again on Monday.
3) I got back a bunch of labs and found that I have an A average
4) I overcame (mostly...) my issues with talking to college guys
5) I helped my friend move dorms and got to eat pizza

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) I had a 3 hour bio lab in the woods, where I had to wear jeans on a hot day so I wouldn't be affected by the poison ivy
2) I had an 8 hour dehydration headache, even with drinking as many liquids as I could
3) I got up at 6:45 yesterday (Um. Ew.)
4) I've been half-assing my APO involvement.
5) I was declined at the ATM because I was too poor to take both my money and pay the ATM fee.

Most Embarrassing Moment:
At Blessings, I barely said a word because I was too shy around a certain person. It sucks, because I like talking and being friendly, but I can actually be unbearably shy sometimes...

Words of Wisdom:
Take care of yourself. My senior year, my mom took me to see my doctor because I kept getting sick like every three weeks. I was tested for mono, hepatitis, anemia, all those things that cause fatigue and sickness. Well, I had a clean bill of health, so the doctor just diagnosed me with "Being a Uni Student". I kid you not. Now I am in college and I am in charge of myself and my well-being. It can be easy to get carried away with trying to be involved in everything, to try to go to every party, to finish all your homework, that you can burn yourself out. Remember to slow down, to say no to things if you feel stretched thin, and get some sleep. Drink plenty of liquids, go outside and lie on the grass, and accept the fact that no one can do it all.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Shorts. We had an Indian summer here in G-Burg. Pack a mixture of clothes, because weather can be tempermental. You can always look at the Farmers Almanac or weather services too, for the area that your college is in and pack accordingly.
2) Study Buddies. Studying with people can be so helpful, especially for classes that involve discussing concepts, languages, etc. I have a study buddy for Spanish!
3) Water Bottles. It's easy to get dehydrated in college because you're always going from building to building, or back to your dorm. Remember to drink liquids beyond the two or three times you are in the cafeteria per day. I have a aluminum water bottle that is really nice, and I fill it with water and put it in our room fridge :]

Best Food Item in the Caf:
I had the tiramisu this week. Enough said. Moving on, if moving on from such a beautiful experience is at all possible.

Plans for the Weekend:
Tonight, I am going on a mother-flipping Scavenger Hunt with APO!! Then tomorrow I am doing a prospective lunch (taking a potential applicant to lunch during their visit pretty much). In the afternoon I will be volunteering at a dinner from 3:45 until like...9:30. Sunday my suite and I are preparing for Halloween as a suite! So, busy, busy here in good ol' Galesburg.

And that's another week, brought to you by Celinda Davis!

Silver and Gold

"Make new friends
But keep the old
One is silver
And the other is gold..."

At Uni High's Subbie Orientation, I met my class. I had come from a small, Montessori school, so I didn't know virtually anyone. At orientation, I met Heather, and I met Revathi, and I met Simone, and I met Seth, and I met a bunch of other people. On that warm August day, I was unaware of the beautiful friendships I would form over the five years. Now, for the first time in five years I am not surrounded by Uni kids, and I understand fully what those friendships mean to me. The friends I have make me laugh, cry, grow, overcome, and find the joy in my life. They changed me, for the better. Those friendships are golden, precious, and irreplaceable, and for that I am eternally grateful.

You can imagine now how terrifying coming to college was. Just like when I was twelve, I entered orientation, meeting people, not knowing of the friendships I was beginning to form. It's been a little over a month now, and I am making new friends. And these friendships are different. There are different jokes, different dramas, different things to cry over, and different obstacles. But they are new, shiny, and full of prospects. These are silver friendships.

When I was really little, my mother taught me an incredibly important lesson. The heart has an unlimited supply of love. When you meet a new person to love, that doesn't diminish the love for a previous person. I can give all the love in the world to my sister, and still have enough for Montessori friends, and family members, and Uni friends, and now Knox friends. Love is the gift that keeps on giving.

I LOVE the friends I am making at Knox. They are hilarious, and kind, and cool, and thoughtful, and interesting. I have great conversations with them. It's so amazing and I am so lucky that I get to meet cool people. Yet, that doesn't diminish the fact that I have beautiful, amazing friendships that started in the halls of Uni High. Those are friends I hope to keep forever, because they are hilarious, and kind, and cool, and thoughtful, and interesting as well.

So, when you go to college, put on a big smile, introduce yourself to people, and keep your mind and your heart open to all the possible friendships you will make. Because those silver friendships you make in those four years in college will become golden someday too. And really, life is a little easier and a lot better when you have friends by your side :]

Much Love,
Celinda

ZZZZZZZZZ: Sleep in College

Sleep in college is....weird.
That honestly is the best description for sleeping in college. You are either getting too much of it or too little of it. Also, you sleep at the most random times. Here I will break down the different sleeping styles found in college, and tips or tricks to balance it all out.

Going to bed past 11 is a common occurrence in college. You have tons of homework and a social life. On weekdays/Sundays, you will find people up past 12, 1, maybe as late as 3 or 4 trying to finish homework assignments or to study for a test. On Fridays and Saturdays, parties or get togethers can keep you out until the break of dawn (literally).
There are two reasons why a student might be up late doing HW:
1) They have a ton of homework, or a huge test
2) They started their homework around 9

The solution to both of them is time management. While it might suck to do work (Uni kids, you understand), sometimes you have to put it first. In fact, by putting work first, you are actually going to have more time and more fun when you get to hang out. Another thing is that when you go to college, your classes (most of the time) won't meet every day. So, often, you will have TWO days to finish an assignment. Don't get comfortable though. Divide up the work over those two days. For example, I will come home on a Monday afternoon from school. I will check to see if I have any Spanish homework, because that meets every day. Then I will either do my Biology or my FP homework, and whichever I don't do, I do on Tuesday. When I spread it out, college is easier than Uni in a lot of ways.

As for the weekend and partying, live and let live. Generally though, you might have to make a compromise so you can get homework done and get some sleep. You could go out on Friday and do some homework Saturday, or vice versa. You could do homework during the day and party all night. However, think about Uni and weekends. Doesn't it suck when Sunday night rolls around and you have all your homework? Don't let that behavior transfer to college. Spread the homework out! Doing a little everyday is SO much easier than doing it all in one night. Several of my suite mates have had to pull all-nighters Sunday because they didn't get their homework done, and that messed them up sleep wise for the entire week.

Naps
Remember in preschool when you didn't want to take a nap? Do you regret that so much? I do too. Here in college though, naps are incredibly common. At least half of my suite (myself included) have just taken a nap in the middle of the day or evening. Sometimes it's because a class gets canceled. Sometimes it's because you don't have homework. Sometimes (like me) it's because you're bored. Sometimes, it's because you're skipping classes (I'M NOT ENDORSING THAT BEHAVIOR).
Whatever the reason, here are some basic things to keep in mind:
1) Don't oversleep, especially on a weekday. By taking too long of a nap, you will actually mess up your sleep schedule by not going to bed later that night.
2) Don't take naps when you have a TON of homework. You will wake up, and the work will still be there. If you are tired and feel like you're falling asleep on the book, go take a five minute walk, drink some water, dance to some music, do yoga, lift some weights, anything but actually SLEEPING

Quiet Hour, Noise, and Standing Up to People:
Quiet hour on weekdays in my suite is 11 PM. That means if you are in the suite area, SHHH. If you are in your room, you generally want to keep quiet. This has been a sore point for me the past few weeks. See, I love sleep. And I don't know about other people, but I have to get up at either 8 or 7:30 everyday, depending on if I have Biology or work. I know, you're thinking, PSH Celinda, I get up at like 5 everyday, understand I hate mornings and I have to get up and get going by myself. So, I want to go to sleep around midnight, maybe a little earlier. Well, some people have giant, enviable social lives. They have people over, music blaring, screaming and laughing so that it just rings throughout the entire suite. And, that will last past the quiet hour. We had to have a suite meeting about it. When you go to college, you will have to become aware of the awful truth: you're living with a bunch of teenagers. To deal with this, there are several actions you can take:
1) Bring earplugs. If you can fall asleep to music, get sound proof headphones and fall asleep to your iPod.
2) If the noise is getting too intense, muster up some courage and knock on the door. Let them know you are trying to sleep or work (so you can sleep). The walls are notoriously thin in college though, so be prepared for their quiet to be still fairly audible.
3) If you don't want a confrontation (understandable) talk to your RA or the Campus Life Office about it. It can be completely anonymous and they're truly adults. Unlike college students, which are just overgrown teenagers.

You're Uni students, so you understand sleep deprivation. Sometimes, I get enough sleep and it's amazing and wonderful and joyful. Sometimes I get too little (like last night) and I am almost falling asleep in Biology. If that happens, coffee can be your friend (keep caffeine before 3, unless you're Rohit, in which case you can drink coffee at any time and have no consequences :] ). Generally though, I am getting more sleep in college than I did when I went to Uni. Which, is crazy. That might just be my college, or it might be me, or it might just be sheer luck. Keep these pointers in mind though, and you will get more sleep in college.

Much Love,
Celinda :]

Weekly Roundup 3 (Three Weeks Already??)

Wow guys. I have been here for almost a month! This is crazy!! I kicked Bio test butt, and it's a beautiful day here in G-Burg! Anyway, time for another weekly roundup!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) ALL OF TODAY
2) I have an established lab partner now who is really cool and nice!
3) Inside jokes in the Caf with my friend Odessa
4) I passed my Spanish Oral exam
5) Volunteering at the Boy's and Girl's Club

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) I lost my glasses...
2) I stayed up way too late every night this week
3) I fail at social interactions between males and females...
4) I couldn't give blood because I might be sick
5) I kinda half-assed my FP paper editing

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
So, I was heading to work on Wednesday, and I was bragging about how I was doing really good at work and how my employer rehires students who do really good work. At work, I was doing Daily Mail. Pretty much, the envelope will contain a letter specific to the student's academic interest, a viewbook (pamphlet of Knox College), and a 60 Second Survey (cards to update or fill in missing information). Since it's almost October, the Daily Mail now includes a card about applying Early Action. I was so concentrated on remembering the Early Action cards that when I finished sealing ALL the envelopes with GLUE, I noticed the entire stack of 60 Second Cards that didn't make it into the envelope. I had to break open every letter with a pen, put the card in, reseal it, and pray to every god I know that it wouldn't break in the mail. It also slowed me down considerably, so I couldn't get to other tasks. FAIL. (Also, I think Daily Mail is cursed because I messed up--only a little--today as well).

Words of Wisdom:
Everyone should be humbled from time to time. It reminds us to be thankful for what we have, it reminds us that we don't know it all, and it reminds us that mistakes are okay. It's been a very humbling week. I was humbled by the kids at the Boy's and Girl's Club, because they were full of unrestrained joy, but for some of them, the only dinner they will get is the small afternoon meal served by the Club. I was also humbled at work. I learned to take my time and to be careful, because I am representing the future of Knox College. I was humbled by Spanish, when my first test came back good, but not amazing--I know now I must study harder and not slide by. Learn from being humbled, because it makes you a better, more knowing, and more thoughtful person.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Umbrella. It rained really badly here on Monday, and I had to go different things in different buildings all evening.
2) Knox ID card. It got me Aristophanes from the library, snacks from the convenience store, meals in the Caf, and the occasional meal/tea in the Gizmo.
3) My Mom. I know that sounds weird, but I studied for Biology by explaining things to her for a total of 3-4 hours throughout the course of the week. It was incredibly helpful.

Most Interesting Discovery This Week:
Academic: Animals "make" different noises in different languages. In Spanish, the rooster says quiri, quiri, quiri and the female chicken says cara, cara, cara.
Social: Watching magic tricks done by your suitemates instead of doing homework can be kinda amazing :]

Best Food Item in the Caf:
Black Bean Burgers. I'm not a vegetarian at all, but these are really, really good. They definitely have a southwestern flavor to them, and they are just a bit spicy. MMMMMMMMM.

Plans for the Weekend: Spanish Composition. Maybe watching the Illinois game because ILLINOIS IS 4-0 Y'ALL :]. Besides that, my weekend is super UN-busy, which is super nice.

Three weeks, el completo. WIN.

Much Love,
Celinda

Pledging APO

Well HEY all of you!

I am no longer just an ordinary, run of the mill blogger. No, now I am a blogger with a PLEDGE PIN.

As of right now, I am a pledge for the co-ed service fraternity Alpha Phi Omega :]

Everyone knows of frats and sororities. If you have been keeping up with the blog, you now know about the good side of frats and sororities. But, even seeing the good side, some of you might not want to join them and THAT'S OKAY. Remember, as a former PCC, I still uphold the belief of supporting all your UNIQUE college/gap year/other processes :]

I want to tell you about those alternative Greek organizations. There are themed sororities/frats, such as music, languages, etc. There are also service frats, and that is what I joined yesterday evening. Pretty much, Alpha Phi Omega (or APO for short) is a co-ed service fraternity formed in 1925. Today, there are around 700 charters all across the US. At Knox, if you pledge to APO, you are promising to give at least ten hours of service and around two (?) hours of membership. Membership hours mean social activities such as study hours, movie nights, and supporting each other at events (like football games and dance performances).

I first came across APO at the carnival of clubs. I had gone in thinking I was going to give my email to two clubs maximum. I kinda gave it to like six...but that's not the point of the story, so we'll ignore my lack of self control. Anyway, one of the clubs was APO. I went up to their booth and they were very friendly. "We focus on service...you can pledge as a first year, first term student...great way to meet older students..." was their spiel. I had read about APO faintly while stalking Knox's website when I was still an applicant. I figured that I would give them my email, and decide later if I wanted to join.

Later that night, I was talking on the phone with my mother, going through my day. Near the end, I mentioned I might possibly join APO. At this my mother got SUPER excited. Turns out, my mother was in APO at the University of Illinois when she was a student. She told me how much fun it had been, and how some of the best friends she had made in college were APO members. About a week later, APO emailed a list of recruitment activities. I decided then and there "Hey...I might go ahead and actually do this" so I went to a Greek Life recruitment activity.

At my recruitment activity, we decorated cupcakes for the maintenance staff. At Knox, the maintenance staff does so much. Because I live in a suite, the staff cleans my main area and bathrooms weekly. We don't pay extra for that service. So, I was super excited to be involved with a project that was a thank you. I also loved how before even pledging, I was doing volunteer work. The people were also a plus. All these older students were so interested in my life, in why I wanted to join. What makes APO interesting is you have all different kinds of people come together for the goals of leadership, service, and brotherhood. You have football players, theater kids, bio nerds, all of them breaking stereotypes and hanging out. And I really mean hang out. They don't just come together unwillingly and half-ass a project. They work together, play Taboo together, study together, and serve the community together. When I realized that, I was sold. Sunday evening, I was pledging

Life can take you in funny directions. A year ago, I was searching adamantly for a college where the Greek life was minimal at best. In fact, one of the reasons I turned away from Vanderbilt was because 50% of the girls were in a sorority. I had done all that work to avoid Greek life, and here I am, pledging to a co-ed service frat. I mean, APO members can pledge to other frats and sororities and I don't plan on doing that, and in a lot of ways APO is not a typical frat/sorority. Yet I still hadn't planned on going NEAR a Greek organization. But, yesterday I dressed up, went to Old Main, and went through the pledging ceremony. I can't tell you exactly what went down, but I can promise you I wasn't hazed, I wasn't left in the middle of a cornfield, I wasn't told to drink as much as I can as fast as I can, or anything like that. No, I swore an oath, and now I am a pledge!

As a pledge, I have to pay dues (like all frats and sororities), but my dues are only $35. Furthermore, this busy term just got busier, because now I have to get service and membership hours in. But, I am super excited. Today I'm giving blood. Next weekend, I am going on a SCAVENGER HUNT through Galesburg (Fun fact about me: I.LOVE.SCAVENGER.HUNTS.) I might go to a study hour this week because I have a bio midterm this week (another thing to blog about lol). So the term will be busy, but fulfilling.

And thus, we wrap up Greek Week. What I really want you to take away from this is not all sororities/fraternities are bad, and not all of them are good. Some don't even fit the stereotypical version of what a frat/sorority is. You don't ever have to join one, or even go visit one. But if you do, use your common sense when joining. If a frat or sorority is hazing you and you don't feel comfortable, why would you want to join that community? PLEASE be safe when hazing. People have died during hazing activities because they don't know how to say NO. Use your voice, your common sense, and it can be an amazing experience in your life. Both Lizzy and Seth have shared that joining Greek life was one of the best decisions they have ever made. I also hope I will be able to say that in the future. Wish me luck!

My APO pin. It's perty :]

Keep posted!
Celinda :]

Weekly Roundup 2

Sooooo....tired....but I will blog, nevertheless....

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I made new friends/acquaintances! In Spanish, FP, Biology, etc.
2) I baked vegan cupcakes with my suite mates
3) I woke up on time EVERYDAY
4) I got to see my admissions counselor
5) I finished my Bio lab work Wednesday with my group successfully :]

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) Not enough sleep on Thursday night...or the rest the week really...
2) Biology is getting really annoying
3) I still haven't gone to the gym
4) Getting up and walking by this cute guy like TEN times and he NEVER noticed.
5) Going to multiple stores trying to find soy yogurt. How my life has changed...

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
I walked into the dessert room with the express purpose to say hi to a guy I kind of like, only to chicken out and just leave with my cookie. When my friend asked me why I didn't say hello, I told her I was so painfully shy, I couldn't even strike up a conversation with him. :[

Words of Wisdom:
You will never know everything. In fact, the more you learn, the more you become aware of all the things you don't know.People shouldn't go into any situation feeling like they know everything, but especially not into college. By believing you know everything, you are actually hindering your ability to learn more things. I think Uni needs to teach its students that we are not so much gifted and intelligent as we are just curious. Curious learners scour books, textbooks, ideas, the natural world, anything, so that they can add to their collection of knowledge. In the grand scheme of our vast world, being curious is a much safer term than being brilliant.

3 Most Essential Items This Week:
1) Debit Card. You run out of things, or you might want to get something special, or a gift. I used it this week for vegan cupcake ingredients, but I have also used it to replenish my cereal.
2) Email. Imagine trying to coordinate 5 different students from different grades on a college campus to finish bio lab homework. It only happened because of email.
3) Sugary treats. There are some rough days, whether because of unrequited love (see above), homework, fights, tests, you name it. Sugary treats like ice cream, cookies, and chocolate will definitely help.

Most Interesting Discover This Week:
Academic: Antigone, besides being a tragedy, is incredibly philosophical The play covers topics such as justice, honor, tyranny/rule, and death.
Social: Vegan cupcakes can be surprisingly delicious, even with soy milk and dairyless sour cream (blegh....)

Best Food Item in the Caf:
Mashed potatoes. I love mashed potatoes in general, but these are freaking delicious. Also, close second are their M&M cookies :]

Plans for the Weekend:
Sleep is a number one priority. I did NOT get enough this week, and I am exhausted. Also, I am pledging Sunday for Alpha Phi Omega, can't wait to blog about that. Besides that, homework. I have a bio test a week from today, and a draft of a 3-5 page paper due Monday, so I got to get crackin' on that :]

And that is SECOND (!!!) full week at Knox, brought to your favorite (graduated!) blogger,

Celinda Davis

PS: Joey started blogging Juniors! Check it out!

Going Greek: Breaking the Myth Part Two

Here is Part Two! To refresh, Seth Bull graduated Uni with me in 2011, and he now attends the Missouri School of Technology. Right now he is a pledge of his fraternity, which means he isn't a full member yet, and as such doesn't know all the inner-workings of his frat. Hopefully, I will be able to do a blog later on with him about frat life, POST-pledge. Here is the interview, enjoy!

1) Why did you want to join a fraternity/sorority?
I didn't. At all. Then I came to the university, met the people there, talked about what it entailed, and met the people in the dorms. At Pikes, everyone seemed to embody the point of a fraternity: brotherhood. The choice made itself really.

2) What is pledging like?
A crap load of chores. But the "normal" pledging stuff really doesn't happen. No one forced me to drink, and I still don't. We aren't hazed, but there are rules. We have to maintain a minimum GPA, and there are loads of things we can't do during the week. But it's rewarding, I've gotten to know 35 guys over 5 weeks better than I've known most people at Uni after 5 years. For me, the people and the experience have thus far outweighed the negatives by a load.

3) What would you say are the positives of being a member?
(i) There is ALWAYS someone to hang out with. Don't want to party that night? Hang with the guy down the hall who wants to watch sport center or play games.
(ii) Help is practically thrown at you. There are 35 other guys all taking freshman courses and 110 others who have taken them before. You will succeed if you want to.
(iii) Friends. I'm already better friends with these guys than most of the people I knew at Uni (sorry :P).
(iv) A network to fall on. Where ever I go, whatever company I work for, there will always be someone who was a Pike, knew a Pike, or was related to a Pike, and knows who we are and what kind of guys join Pi Kappa Alpha.
(v) The nicest digs on campus. Seriously, I pay less for a better house with better people than everyone else on campus.

4) What would you say are the negatives of being a member?
At least for me the time commitment is massive. I have to study for in house stuff, along with my regular work. I also have to do a minimum number of volunteer hours per semester and various duties around the house.

Theres also the way people outside the Greek system look at us. Everyone pictures animal house, and I can assure you, if that was the case here, I would have been the last person on earth to sign up. I hate that stereotype. My house isn't like that in the slightest. We're no where near perfect, but we try damn hard to get as close as possible.

5) What kind of person succeeds in a fraternity/sorority?
It's hard to say. There isn't one kind of person that would be good in all fraternities. There are different fraternities that expect different things. I chose Pike because they're smart, but good in athletics, and are genuinely fun guys to be around. If I'm forced to pick a guy in school who'd be good in a fraternity, I'd say it's that natural leader person. The guy who's the top of everything, seemingly without trying. Parties hard, works harder. But there is loads of wiggle room. I'd say almost anyone can contribute to a fraternity.


6) Is there hazing? What is it like?
No. And anyone who even says they'll haze you is immediately kicked out. They take that stuff seriously. Hazing doesn't promote brotherhood, which is the entire point of a fraternity. Again, that might not be the case everywhere, but here in Rolla, at Pi Kappa Alpha, you will not be hazed. You will do chores until you have memorized every nook and cranny of your area, but you will not be hazed.

7) Many Greek "societies" do service work. What is your fraternity/sorority's cause?
I'm pledging for Pi Kappa Alpha, aka Pikes. We do it all. In two weeks we'll be doing stuff for JDRF in STL, and a few after that, we'll do some stuff with Habitat. There are volunteer opportunities all over the place.


8) Is there anything else you would like to add, wisdom you want to give for people planning on joining Greek life?

Don't be scared of it. Not all fraternities are animal house, but you ought to be careful. Even in lil ol' Rolla there are some bad fraternities. You should have your guard up, especially when you're looking at all the different houses. Remember, they're trying to get you to Rush. But if you find the house where you fit, it'll be the greatest choice of your life. These guys I'm surrounded by are some of the coolest, smartest, and most fun people I've been around. Joining Pikes was the best choice I've ever made.

Both Seth and Lizzy are sooo amazing, for taking the time out to answer my questions. At the end of this weekend, I will write a blog about my own experiences with pledging, as well as giving some information about those "alternate" fraternities, (themed, co-ed, etc). I'm also going to do a blog (hopefully tomorrow!) about sleeping in a dorm and sleep at college in general. Trust me, I have a LOT to say.

Much Love,
Celinda

Going Greek: Breaking the Myth Part One

Watch this clip first:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-86etz3cGw
This is the media's portrayal of Greek life. At some colleges, or some houses, this is how it is. However, not every college or house is like that. I interviewed Lizzy Warner, who graduated from Uni in 2009, and attends Knox College. I also interviewed Seth Bull, who graduated from Uni in 2011, and attends the Missouri Institute of Technology. They graciously agreed to answer my questions. I myself am pledging to a co-ed service fraternity Alpha Phi Omega, and I will write a separate blog about that this weekend. Remember, if you are interested in Greek life, do your research. Many houses are committed to sisterhood/brotherhood, service, and school. As you'll discover, some houses will kick you out if you aren't helping the community, do excessive partying, or fall under a certain GPA. Keep an open mind, and use your common sense. Some houses are dangerous, full of the media's picture of drugs, alcohol, sex, rape, and hazing. Not all of them are like that though!

Because I got such thoughtful and well-written answers to my questions, I am doing a two part blog for Greek Life. First up is Lizzy and Sororities!

1) Why did you want to join a fraternity/sorority?
Well I kind of had the idea in my head of joining a sorority early on because my mom was in a sorority and my dad was in a fraternity and "Going Greek" didn't come with any negative stereotypes for me. In fact, I grew up almost idolizing the Greek system because I was able to see what great friends my mom had and the values those friends shared with each other. It is a lifelong friendship and even with people she didn't know but with whom she had that shared history with, they were immediately closer. Now that I am also a Pi Phi (I am a Pi Phi and Knox legacy from my mom) I can really see that becoming reflected in my own life.

2) What is pledging like?
Pledging is somewhat intimidating. Words are thrown around a lot amongst non-Greeks so to clarify "Recruitment" (we are not allowed to call it Rush any more) is when girls go through and choose which houses they want and which organizations want them in return. Pledging means that you have already accepted your bid and you are part of that organization but you have not yet initiated. If you have not yet initiated then you do not know all the secrets and are not considered a full member yet. Pledging can be intimidating not because it is scary but because you don't really know what to expect since no one can tell you what is going to happen. There are a lot of secret ceremonies involved and you are constantly learning new phrases, songs, and names of people. It is great because all of a sudden you have 50 new people who are genuinely interested in getting to know you and support you but at the same time it is a lot to take in. The pledging process, though, is much more of a relief than formal recruitment. I don't know about at other bigger schools, but that is why informal recruitments tend to have such a great turn out here.. because people are overwhelmed by formal recruitment and going from house to house and meeting so many new people all in just a few short days. That being said, I went through formal recruitment and I loved it!

3.) What would you say are the positives of being a member?
* A whole chapter of girls who, like real sisters (even if you don't hang out all the time and don't do the same things) are genuinely interested in supporting you helping you, and they alway have your back (and vice versa).
*It is a great way to meet a bunch of people you really wouldn't have met otherwise. For example, had it not been for Pi Phi I never would have gone to a volleyball game or a Terp show.
*It links you to people of all generations all throughout the country in a way where you share the same secrets and same bonds and it automatically brings you closer.
* Our alums are kick ass! It is like having a temporary mom at school. They help you with groceries and furnish the house and hang out with you when, like me, you have to be at school alone 3 weeks early!
*Artificially, we have am awesome house with a lot of resources to use. We have our own kitchen, office and office supplies, giant televisions, etc. and while that wouldn't be a reason to join it is definitely an added bonus once you have made the decision.
*You get involved with the campus and community more. There are required philanthropy hours and additionally we all like to support our sisters at the events that they attend/host so you really get involved with what is going on. It forces you to get out of your own bubble
* It keeps your grades up. We have required study hours and required GPA's to meet. We have giant study parties and prizes that we can win if we get A's or don't skip any class for a week.
* You are not only connected with people from your organization but you are also connected with Greek men and women all over the country
* It makes you become a leader. You learn how to run a meeting, make a motion, etc. You are given the tools to communicate with adults and leaders on campus and you are highly encouraged to take on a leadership role within the chapter. The role I have as Vice President of Communications and Panhel Delegate has honestly been one of the most influential roles I have taken on in that it has taught me to mature as a person.

4) What would you say are the negatives of being a member?
* Many people have bad stereotypes of the Greek system and don't understand it as a whole. I remember the first day a freshman told me he went to a kickass party at a sorority house on campus, to impress me. Sorority houses, while a common misconception, are not allowed to host open parties. It is small these like this that make it difficult, knowing it is both students and professors who don't fully respect it.
* You have to be able to have the time commitment. It isn't huge but it is what you make of it. If you choose not to attend the 1 hour chapter meetings every Sunday, yes you will be in trouble with the chapter but, additionally, you really aren't going to end up appreciating it and getting the full experience. You have to be willing to attend your sisters activities too and take time out of your day like you would for any other club or organization
*Dues. They really aren't that bad considering you pay dues once every fall term and then that covers all expenses you may have the rest of the term. For example, we had mixers and social events with other organizations. This weekend we are going bowling and eating pizza and not paying anything out of pocket because we paid our dues at the beginning of term. Nonetheless, it is still money that you can't spend. I pay my dues myself by just holding a campus job, though, and I still have a lot of extra money so it isn't as though it is a huge burden on this campus.

5.  What kind of person succeeds in a fraternity/sorority?
I am sure Seth and I will have different answers for this question. It is because Knox is just a different place in general. It is filled with such an assortment of people I feel like more than half of my chapter will tell you that when they first came to Knox there was no possible way that they thought they would ever join a sorority. Really, anyone can fit in here, you just have to be willing to treat your sorority sisters like your actual sisters. You need to be able to make time to support them, attend events together, etc. and they will do the same for you. There are definitely those stereotype of sorority girls-- the kind who wear a lot of make up and party a lot-- but in reality we have very strict grade requirements, if you party a lot you are brought in front of our standards board who have the authority to discipline you (e.g. you could go on social probation), and I am sure we have girls who, to this day, can count the number of times they have ever worn a dress. It's just about what you make of it.

6) Is there hazing? What is it like?
Fraternities say they don't haze. It is often called "brotherhood" activities, or something of the like. But because hazing has been so publicized and received such negative press we actually have very strict hazing policies. You are not allowed to take your members on a scavenger hunt, you can not mandatorily require any class (new members or seniors) to do an activity all together (even if it is doing something like playing flag football), we can't call recruitment "rush"... there are a lot of things that we are not allowed to do. And the punishments are severe, most likely resulting in the removal of your charter (i.e. your house and chapter would be removed from the campus). Therefore, all sororities that I know of take anti-hazing very seriously.

7) Many Greek "societies" do service work. What is your fraternity/sorority's cause?
I am a member of Pi Beta Phi. Our national philanthropy is literacy and we are teamed with First Book to promote literacy. What this means is that literacy is what we focus on and strive to volunteer for. We have a certain number of hours that we are supposed to dedicated towards volunteering for literacy (and for our chapter, by certain number of hours, I mean 2). Aside from that you can complete your philanthropy hours, or just for the fun of it, by doing any other volunteer activities. The best part about it is that you have so many girls who want to volunteer too that if you find something you are passionate about then it is easy to get a lot of people behind you and volunteering with you.

8) Is there anything else you would like to add, wisdom you want to give for people planning on joining Greek life?
Don't go in it with preconceived misconceptions. It is hard to do but in order to find an organization that you want to be a part of you need to make sure you would want to be a part of it, even without the Greek affiliation and the nice house. You just want to better yourself and surround yourself with people who will help you do that and make it fun along the way! I really, really encourage everyone (especially Knox students) to go through recruitment. If it isn't your cup of tea, no one will hold it against you. And I really do mean that! No one holds hostilities against the girl who showed up and realized that this really isn't something that she has time for, etc. I hold a job, work as an intern, I am overloading my courses this term and taking all math classes at that, I am charge of recruitment with Panhel, I have track training, and I am our VPCommunications and despite how busy my schedule is I know that I would never drop Pi Phi for anything and I would love if other people were able to experience the same feeling. I know that every school is different and our campus is so small, but from what I have learned being here, no matter who you are or how busy you are you should at least think about it.

Making A Difference: Volunteering

He was in a wheelchair. He had pretty much lost the ability to communicate, to react to the world around him, and to take care of himself. He was ancient, the wrinkles deep in his weathered skin. His daughter had lovingly tied a green balloon to his wheel chair. I saw him smile, and he playfully bounced the balloon with a closed fist. I saw so much joy in his face, it made me ashamed. I was ashamed because today (or most days really), I have not felt or expressed unmitigated joy in simply being alive.

Today, I volunteered at the St. Mary's Square Fall Fling. The center services people with disabilities, as well as the extremely elderly or in need of extreme medical care. Their link is found here: http://www.smsliving.org/ 
Two other freshman girls and I helped set up, served food, and put everything up. It was work that kept us on our feet for 3-4 hours. And I would do it again tomorrow, if need be.

There is something very powerful about making a difference. Our world is full of problems. Everywhere you turn, something else seems to be wrong. Some days, I stop and I feel terror for the future. I lose faith in humanity, in hope, in doing anything for my future, because why try for nothing redeeming? But when I volunteer, I know that in my small sphere of influence, I am making a difference.

I am one very small being. I will NEVER change the world. But, I can make a difference. I can bring a smile to someone's face, or help someone with their homework, or just listen to someone's troubles, even if I am powerless to change it. And, soon enough, the beautiful network of human connection, of human EMPATHY, can make collective differences. Each and every one of us has the ability to affect someone's life for the better, even in the most minute ways. That is why I choose to volunteer.

College is an amazing time to volunteer. Even the smallest colleges will have large amounts of volunteer opportunities, for all kinds of interest. My friend Ella hopes to be an Environmental Studies major, so she is joining an environmental club that is fighting to make Knox green. I myself am planning on volunteering at the Boys and Girls Club and Alpha Phi Omega (which is a co-ed service fraternity). Later on, I plan on joining Reading Buddies and a mentoring program. There are literally a million ways to volunteer AND follow your passions. If a college doesn't have what are you looking for, create your own opportunity. College has so much freedom, and you can use that freedom to fight for your causes.

I had fun, and I got a lot out of it too. I made a new friend, a girl in my class I have never talked to. I also got to hang out with my friend Ella. I got to help at a center that I believe is filled with heroes. I got to come home feeling accomplished on a Sunday. And I won a pumpkin, in the raffle. That's the thing about volunteering. You aren't just making a difference in the lives of others, but changing your own life. The changes can be intangible, like making you more responsible, more sympathetic, a better listener, or a better leader. The changes can be tangible, like a FREAKING PUMPKIN :D

My point is, whatever your cause or interest, use college to make a difference and volunteer. It truly means the most in our crazy, messed up world.

Much Love,
Celinda!

                                                                  Me and Herman!! :D

Partying in G-Burg! (The Truth about Partying)

I went to a frat party last night.
As I was there, half my mind was on a blog I wanted to write (I know, sad. Don't judge me :P). This is a blog about drinking, pre-gaming, campus safety, alcohol poisoning, being sober, parties, grinding, and how to navigate it all. I am not here to tell you not to drink or party or grind. I'm not here to tell you TO drink or party or grind. No, I am just going to give you information, and let you draw your own conclusions. Each person will live their lives differently in college, and that's okay.

So, I decided I would go to the Sigma Nu party. They weren't serving alcohol and there was going to be a DJ. It sounded like fun. I put on my make-up, a cute little top, and went out with my friends. And overall, the night was a lot of fun. I danced, I laughed, I felt all pretty and dressed up. And even though the fire alarm went off and we decided to come back around 12:30, it was still a good night.

I'm sharing my own experience because I want to dispel all the rumors of college partying, such as:

1) All people drink, or the party is centered around drinking
Not necessarily. Drinking does happen. Sometimes it's excessive and sometimes it's light/social. If you don't want to drink, you should never feel pressured to do so. Surround yourself with other sober, fun people. The girls I went with didn't drink a drop of alcohol, and we had fun. If you do want to drink some in college, then there are some important points to keep in mind:

-Have a solid plan of getting home, or keeping safe. Many count on a person, known as the Sober Friend (I myself have offered to be the sober friend that they can call). Also, have Campus Safety's number. Their first job is to get you HOME safe and sound. Rape, sexual assault, and other negative side affects of alcohol can happen, so have a plan to keep safe. One of my suite mates wears heels when she doesn't want to drink too much, as a safeguard, for example (she wants to still be able to walk in them, so it stops her from drinking too much).

-Be aware of alcohol poisoning. Someone I know had to go to the hospital during orientation to get their stomach pumped. Because their room mate and RA knew the signs of alcohol poisoning, the two of them SAVED the person's life. Here are the symptoms to look for http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/alcohol-poisoning/DS00861/DSECTION=symptoms. If you suspect someone you know is sick, or might have alcohol poisoning, contact your RA/Campus Safety as well as 911. You don't want someone to die because of being passive.

-Try to moderate your drinking, or at least try to avoid drinking excessive amounts of alcohol throughout the week. Alcohol dependence is a very real thing, and it would suck to go to rehab (which happened for a few Knox kids last year) or develop alcoholism before you're even legally ALLOWED to drink.

2) I have to grind at parties
Again, not necessarily. Does grinding happen? Yes, a whole hell lot of it. Imagine a Uni dance, without Kovacs, and you can guess how much grinding happens. I personally don't like grinding because I think it's like having vertical sex. As a dancer, I much prefer enjoying the beat of the music and being an individual. Some others just might not like grinding. If you do like grinding, then remember to use your common sense. If you feel uncomfortable with the person you're dancing with, or you feel like it might be heading towards sexual assault or "unwanted touching" (please, hold your snickers), then feel feel to push them away, or get a friend or a big dude to help you out. If you are a guy and feel awkward, then push them away and let the crowd create space for you. Remember, you have a voice, so say NO if you mean NO. You can enjoy dancing without grinding or with grinding. It's your choice, remember that. Also, be prepared for some third wheeling. I was dancing, and a couple was grinding behind me, and they were getting into it. So much so, they kept backing up into me. So. Awkward.

3) I have to go to parties
NO YOU DON'T. While the pressures of Greek life will vary from college to college, you never have to go to a party if you don't want to. The beauty of college is there is so much to do! If you like writing or books, find literary clubs. If you like volunteering, join volunteer opportunities/social action clubs. If you like sports, join intramurals. My point is, if you don't want to party, find like-minded people. Not all college students want to party. Similarly, if you want to party light or party sober, there will be people like that too. My friends like to dance and be social and dress up, but not drinking and grinding. It takes all types to make a college. There will be people who drink and party and grind and have lots of sex. There will be people who never go out, never really make friends, who never date, and graduate anonymously. Those are the two extremes, and almost everyone will fall in between them.

Quick Descriptions/Thoughts:
-Pre-gaming is the act of drinking before going to a party, or drinking so you arrive buzzed. Often times, those who pre-game plan to drink more later on. If you join pre-gaming activities, make sure you know your limits. If you are a lightweight, try to avoid pre-gaming.
-Never leave your drink unattended if you can. I'm not going to write a college horror story, but bad things can happen. Drugs or alcohol can be slipped in your drink. Please be safe. Hold onto it. If you need to go to the bathroom or something short-term, have a trusted individual hold it. If you want to go dance, go ahead and throw your drink out or gulp it. It's better to waste it or to not savor it than to open yourself up to something dangerous.
-Many people concentrate on the drinking aspect of frat parties, but drugs can play a role too. There was definitely a few people high at last night's party. I won't stand here and tell you not to do drugs. I hope you won't do drugs. Generally, pot and mild drugs aren't bad unless they are hindering your everyday function (going to class, completing homework, honoring promises). Usually though, it's best to stay away from drugs. Last night their was a high guy who kept dancing nearer and nearer to us, backing us to a corner. Finally, my friend Odessa and I went to get a drink. Really, we were escaping the creepy high guy. If you feel uncomfortable, again, just move, push them away, or pull a friend or a big guy over to help you out. Just like alcohol, people react differently to drugs, so be careful.

I hope you didn't think any of this was a lecture. Really, I want all of you to go out and have fun in college. If you want to rush a sorority or fraternity, THAT'S OKAY. If you never want to step foot in a Greek house, THAT'S OKAY TOO. Just be smart, have common sense, create a network of support (campus safety, RAs, sober friends), and know that you have the power of choice. You can say yes or no to anything when it comes to yourself and what you're comfortable with.

Much Love,
Celinda :]

Weekly Roundup! :D

I have decided that since Fridays are the end of the academic week, I would use Fridays as my weekly roundup. Here I share the best, the worst, the funniest, the most embarrassing, and the most successful parts of the week!

5 Best Things This Week:
1) I passed the two daily quizzes I have taken so far in Biology
2) I have a new Spanish study buddy
3) I skyped/called with several Uni people (Simone, Revathi, Heather, and Chris)
4) Shady and I make it a daily activity to do homework together in the afternoon
5) I stamped, signed, and sealed several hundred letters for prospective students

5 Worst Things This Week:
1) Waking up late Monday morning
2) Having my lab extend past 3:50 because we kept making mistakes
3) People being loud in and around the dorm past midnight, when I'm trying to sleep
4) Wonky phone service
5) Not going to the gym

Most Embarrassing Moment This Week:
My friends and I were walking up to our suite one day. Since I was in the lead, I pulled out my keys and tried to open the door. The first key didn't work, so I tried the second one. It didn't work either, so I freaked out, saying "Guys, I think my keys are broken!". They were laughing. It was then I realized I was frantically trying to open the door to suite 5. Legitimately shaking the door knob, so suite 5 would be well aware of the crazy person trying to break down their door...
(They still tease me every time we go past that door...such good friends I'm making in college...)

Words of Wisdom:
Right before graduation, Zen Bear (aka Erick D.) told me not to worry so much about things. Looking back at all the worry I had this week (waking up late, first full week of school, social issues), compared to what actually happened, I realized how right he was. Bad things happen. Or, you might be waiting for bad things to happen. However, excessive worry not only causes undue stress, but can actually hinder you from living life. So, try worrying less.

3 Most Essential Items Used This Week:
1) Sweaters. It got freaking cold up here in G-Burg :[
2) Headphones. You live with a lot of people, and those people bring a lot of people over. Headphones are essential for escaping the noise.
3) Cellphones. Not just for calling home, but for communication with Uni kids and Knox kids, as a clock, and as a supplemental alarm. As I learned the hard way Monday.

Most Interesting Discovery This Week:
Academic: Many scientists were skeptical of Darwin's idea of Natural Selection. When they first came across Mendel's work, they thought it actually was in conflict with the idea of Natural Selection. Eventually though, scientists combined both theories to create a Modern Synthesis of Population Genetics :]
Social/College: The Science and Math building (SMC) is unfortunately shaped like a swastika...whoopsies architects...

Best Food Item in the Caf:
The fries, which include waffle, curly, and smiley face. SO GOOD NOM NOM NOM

Plans for the Weekend:
Soooo many. Tonight I am going to a frat party, possibly a concert being held here. Tomorrow my suite mates and I are going to dinner at the Caf, then going to go see THE LION KING IN 3D (My. Life. Rocks.). Then Sunday, I am volunteering at a carnival held at the Living Center, which services people with disabilities. Busy, busy!

And that's a week of my life at Knox. Now off to study for my Spanish Oral Exam!

Much Love,
Celinda